Friday, May 6, 2011
Born a century past my time?
Thinking on these things this morning, I thought of my other post from yesterday and it *clicked* for me. Back in those days *most* women did not socialize on a regular basis. They had socials now and then and THAT is when they got together and enjoyed one another. They may have seen each other in town and chit-chatted for a while. They may have gone to help a sister in need. They may have seen each other at church if they were close enough to go. But, one thing is for sure, if they were not the privileged socialites, they didn't have friends they held tea with every day. I am absolutely certain they didn't have "girls night out".
I think they may have had their own "forms" of texting one another. Sending notes with the kids who were not schooled at home to give to their friend's children. Passing messages along through their husbands or through the mercantile in town.
Back in those days, certainly no one got their feelings hurt because they hadn't heard from their friends for a few days or weeks. They probably thought about them, and cared for them, but they didn't *need* that constant contact.
I wonder when that changed. Technology is great, but is it THAT great? Has it made us too co-dependent? Has it kept us TOO close in contact? Has this hyper-contact contributed to the break down of families because we are not as focused on our families as we were created to be?
I have felt guilty for being like I am. I love my friends. I love to see them. I love to hear from them. However, I do not need contact often to feel validated, thought about and loved. Others seem to need that like I don't. I don't think it makes you a bad friend if you are not a constant presence, I think it makes you a different kind of friend. Just yesterday when I blogged I was feeling a lot of guilt. Then a friend posted a status on facebook about how it was Godly to be a good friend, to return calls, to get to know your friends on a deep level, to reach out to other Mom's with Christ's love. It made me feel even worse. Certainly I reach out to those I feel led to reach out to. Certainly I do what I can to get to know my friends on an intimate level. Do I forget to return phone calls? Oh yes, I do. Not purposefully and not because I don't care. Do I still care for my friends, pray for them, think about them? Certainly.
I am just a pioneer in a modern day world. God created me with all my quirks...I was planned for this day and this time. I was encouraged to hear that I am certainly not alone. Thank you ladies, each and every one of you. Even the ones who like lots of contact and interaction. :)
(Picture is from a website Recollections, that sells beautiful historic clothing...if only I had somewhere to wear it)